What’s true?
The truth is, I had trouble getting out of bed last week. I was wrestling with my need to make money and create a fully self-expressed version of my art. I began to feel like there was no space in this world for me to make money while also creating work that I love.
What’s true?
The truth is I have felt blocked from myself. Oh yes, the woman with all the advice and all the answers and who helps other people find clarity, laid in a bed of confusion, mentally stuck, and paralyzed, unable to see what her next move should be.
Surprised? Hopefully not. By now, I hope that you see that I am human, and I have never wished to be anything more than that. A free. Human. Being.
What’s true?
I am at my best when I can be both a student and a teacher. Lately, I’ve confined myself to the role of a teacher, assuming that’s what you wanted, what you needed—an answer key for life’s challenges.
Spoiler alert: I can’t be her, not without sacrificing myself in the process.
I share this to convey that this blog is evolving. It’s a living, breathing, being, and therefore it’s time for it to change.
You might like the changes, or you might not. But here is what I know. I never wanted a life that I wasn’t free to change. So why would I continue to build one?
How Will It Change?
I can no longer promise you step-by-step advice. I can’t promise you a clear roadmap. And if I am being fully honest, it never felt right to do so in the first place.
But here is what I can promise that I have done, and I will continue to do: I’ll always strive to make you feel seen. I’ll transform my painful experiences into lessons, hoping we can all gain a bit more wisdom.
What’s true?
What’s true is transforming pain into perspective is my art, and I can be your art teacher.
I wonder if that is enough for you.
If all I’m providing is perspective, it might not be sufficient for some. And that’s okay. I grant you the freedom to seek the teacher you’re ready for. A teacher who can provide a step by step formula to provide the answer you’re searching for. That’s a math teacher. I am not a math teacher. I can’t give you formulas for life equations that guarantee you a specific result.
And even if I could. I wouldn’t because I don’t believe that’s actually the point (no pun intended).
What I can do is open a blank canvas, hand you a few brushes, and let you freely create. Once you’re done, we can both step back and examine the life you’ve painted, and discuss what we see. I might help you discover something unexpected, but if you seek mathematical certainties, guarantees, you’re in the wrong place.
I don’t believe in guarantees. In fact, a significant part of my role is helping others move forward despite the uncertainty of outcomes.
The point is to help you truly live and make sense of your lived experiences. So what can we learn from a teacher who has spent the past few months stuffing herself into a box that began to suffocate her?
Lessons From a Box Stuffer
If you take nothing else away from this post, I hope that I am showing you that you are free to change the moment you decide to.
You are free to change the moment you decide to.
Arielle Davis
I simply don’t want to live like this anymore, and so I won’t. Am I afraid that there will be consequences?
Absolutely.
Do I worry that I will lose many of you?
100%.
But at the end of the day, if I lose one or all of you by being the bravest, truest, and freest version of myself then did I ever really have you anyway?
What Does This Mean for Your Own Life?
It means that change will feel scary. It means that people may abandon you, leave you, and reject you, but at the end of the day, you face two threats of abandonment.
One: being abandoned by people who won’t accept the real you: a Human. Being.– who is designed by God to grow, change, and evolve.
Two: abandoning your God-given design, rejecting the creation that you are (to me, this is sin).
You are divinely designed for change, and so is the rest of the universe. When people say God doesn’t change, I argue they haven’t met God. Look around you; no two moments are the same. Change is inherent in life, and accepting the impermanence of your current identity is the entire point. Why else would we die? We were never meant to be permanent, so why deny ourselves what we were created to be—always shifting, always changing, always dying, always being reborn?
Why Is It So Hard to Live as We Were Created to Live?
We’ve been conditioned to believe that our value is determined by others, not ourselves or God. God sees you as eternally worthy and valuable, and change is the entire point. But God’s voice is often drowned out by the voices of people, especially those we love, who discourage, scare, and shame us for wanting to be our truest and freest selves. They do this in various ways:
- Rejecting us: “I liked you better the way you were. I’m not sure I can handle this new version of you.”
- Dismissing us: “You’re just going through a phase. It won’t last.”
- Comparing us: “Why can’t you be more like [someone else]? They have their life together.”
- Guilting us: “All these changes are causing problems. Can’t we just go back to how things were?”
- Belittling us: “You’re wasting your time with all this stuff. It won’t get you anywhere.”
- Blaming us: “This change is ruining our relationship. It’s all your fault.”
- Minimizing us: “I don’t understand why you’re so bothered by all this. Stop being so sensitive.”
- Undermining us: “What happens if that doesn’t work? You don’t want to deal with that.”
What’s true?
Change scares the shit out of people.
They fear changing themselves and witnessing those they love change. If you’re waiting to grow and evolve when others are ready to support you, you might wait forever.
| Related: Embracing Freedom Within Structure: A Journey of a Free Spirit
No One May Ever Give You Permission to Change
So guess what?
You have to give permission to yourself. You have to free yourself to change, despite who may leave, despite who may judge and despite who may shame you.
You have to free yourself to change, despite who may leave, despite who may judge and despite who may shame you.
Arielle Davis
This is the only path to freedom. Moving past fear and stepping into pain to tap into your power.
| Related: Tips For Women To Speak With Authenticity and Power
You are a divine and dynamic being designed to embrace the different versions of yourself over time.
One of your greatest challenges in life will be to accept, love, and release all of those versions.
But you can do it. We can do it.
You can greet your growth with curiosity and honor; you can meet every version of yourself that emerges with an insatiable hunger to understand that version. You can honor that version by just refusing to push it down, or away because it feels too new or scary. This is where your freedom and happiness live–in staying open, present, and curious.
I am inviting you to free yourself to change, alongside me.
It is an invitation to live truthfully, freely and courageously.
So my divine friend, will you join me?
2 comments