Let me know if this sounds familiar. You have an amazing idea or want to do something new, but then you start talking yourself out of it before giving yourself a chance to try. Suddenly you’re worried about what other people think of you, making it difficult to follow through with your plan. Being overly concerned with what others think is detrimental to discovering who you truly are and what you want. It can hinder your journey of self-discovery.
Let’s get into some of the reasons why.
3 Ways Being Concerned About Others’ Opinions Affects Self-Exploration
You can’t focus on what matters; YOU.
When you worry too much about what other people think of you, it’s hard to focus on your feelings and values. And that’s because when this happens, your mind is consumed by thoughts like: “What will they think if I do this?” or “What if they see me doing that?” or “Am I going about this in the right way?”
These questions take up mental space and energy that you could use to build a life you love and are proud of. There are plenty of things in life that demand our attention more than what others think about us. When we let ourselves get caught up in worrying about these things (whether it be pleasing others or seeking validation from them), we lose focus on the things that matter most to us personally: our own lives, values, goals, and dreams for ourselves. We also lose sight of what makes us happy as individuals. Why are we so worried about what others think of us anyway?
You’re letting your inner critic take over.
If you’re worried about what other people think of you, it could be because your inner voice already criticizes and judges who you are. So you start to believe that other people will criticize and judge you as harshly as you judge yourself.
Maybe there’s something that makes you feel insecure about yourself. Perhaps it’s because you don’t think you’re smart enough, pretty enough, talented enough, successful enough, rich enough, or whatever – the F- enough. Either way, let me tell you something that may blow your mind: Your worth has nothing to do with your evaluation of it or anyone else’s. You are worthy. Period.
Think of it this way, when a baby is born, does that baby’s value come from being cute, smart, or talented? No. It comes from just being alive. Guess what? That never changes. The exact worth you were born with is the same worth you die with. Generations of people and a series of cosmic events all came together so that YOU could be here. You are valuable without having to do anything. So it’s time you spend more time uncovering your worth instead of minimizing or criticizing it. And it’s hard to discover what YOU want and who YOU want to be when you’re so busy trying to figure out what everyone else wants and expects from you.
Your worth has nothing to do with your evaluation of it or anyone else’s. You are worthy. Period.Arielle Davis
You become confused about what you truly want.
Worrying about what other people think is a great way to confuse yourself and make it more challenging to be true to yourself. When you’re worrying about what other people think, you’re not focusing on the things that matter, like spending time getting to know yourself-your TRUE self. The you that YOU are when you feel relaxed and safe.
Instead of thinking about these things, you’ll spend all your time trying to figure out whether or not someone else approves of you—which makes it impossible for you to uncover your TRUE self because your TRUE self isn’t concerned with everyone else’s approval and happiness. Your TRUE self knows that he/she/ they are here to learn, grow and be. And by be, I mean to live life without self-criticism and self-judgment. Your true self will live life with curiosity and courage.
The best thing you can do is stop focusing all your attention on everyone else and start focusing your energy and attention on yourself. It’s a healthy self-discovery therapy.
How To Start The Process of Self-Discovery
Asking yourself questions can help you start getting to know yourself better.
How do you get to know someone else? You spend time with them and ask questions about their feelings, thoughts, and experiences. The process of getting to know yourself isn’t much different. You start by taking the time to ask yourself about your feelings, thoughts, and experiences. Here are a few good questions to ask yourself while you’re getting started;
- When am I happiest?
- What do I consistently struggle with?
- What do I want to change most about myself?
- What matters most to me?
Answering these few questions will set you on the beginning of your path towards self-discovery. We should all make an effort to develop a regular practice of asking ourselves questions because it helps us know how we want our lives to look on a fundamental level and what we want our days, weeks, and years ahead to look like. It’s not something that comes easily; it takes work—but this work is worth doing if it means living authentically and openly.
Remember that you are the only one who can live your life. You can’t please everyone, and you don’t have to. Your happiness is what matters most. So, embrace the power of self-discovery for your betterment.
Important Tips To Remember For your Self-Discovery Process
Be courageous enough to move on from people who don’t truly accept and support you if you have to. I promise you that there will be people on your path who will show you what true love feels like. You deserve so much more than what you will be offered by those who only love you when it feels comfortable or convenient for them.
If someone has a problem with you being you, you can talk to them about it- especially if that person is someone you love and care about. But if that person doesn’t do the inner work to love and accept you as you are and who you grow into, then let them go. Because the truth is they don’t love you if they don’t love the real you. You don’t need to let other people’s opinions and actions define who you are or how you feel about yourself.
Believing and accepting that you have worth in the world, regardless of what others think, can take time, but it’s worth the journey.Even if you aren’t exactly sure who you are yet or what you want to do with your life, knowing that you’re worth all of the time and effort of getting to know just as much as anyone else is so important. You are so worthy.
Don’t be afraid to spend time uncovering who you are. And when you start figuring yourself out, don’t be scared to show the world. Being unique and daring to be different is what makes you beautiful. Embrace the knowledge that self-discovery never ends and it’s a journey to explore and enjoy. There is always something new to express or experience. You are a beautiful blend of your experiences. Always remember that you are worthy of love, acceptance, and exploration.